IVF do You?

The RE's office called today to confirm cancelling our upcoming IUI cycle this month due to DH's last S/A results...we knew that was gonna happen. They're recommendation is that we now pursue IVF w/ICSI. I knew this was going to happen, but DH was in denial until we got the call today. He cant seem to understand how bad off we really are fertility wise, considering he was once VERY fertile. I still don't think he believes this is actually happening to us. In a way I understand that because it is a lot to take in, but I also have been conditioning myself for this the last year or so because I had a feeling all along this is where we were headed. It just sucks that we have to pay nearly 20K for something that most couples can do for free in their bedroom and have fun while doing it. Make a baby that is...

On Monday the financial advisor at our clinic will be calling to do a financial consult with us over the phone to give us more information on costs and options. It is A LOT of money we are talking here and the economy is not good right now so we'll see how that goes. After that (no date set yet) we will have a IVF consult with the Dr. to go over the time line, what it involves, and to answer any questions we may have about the process.

I am not sure exactly when we will be starting, but sometime in the near future. The last week has been VERY hard on me. I have been crying every day, sometimes 2-3 times per day. I just felt so lost and in limbo. For those that know me IRL know that I am always a very happy go lucky girl, but what you don't see is a person who's emotional state is wearing thin. I want this to be over, I want the burden of infertility to be gone, I want me back.