Showing posts with label TTC # 3. Show all posts
Showing posts with label TTC # 3. Show all posts
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
12dpiui
Here I am 12dpiui, my usual test date. But not this time! This 2ww is the last 2ww I will ever have. The last time I will ever have a possibility of being pregnant, so I am going to milk it for all its worth. In all honestly, I thought is was going to be really really hard to wait until 14 days past my IUI to test, because usually I am DYING to know by 12 days. This time remains different, because its been easy. Almost too easy. I don't want it to end, I want to stay in my hope bubble.
Reality is though, is that deep down I don't think I'm pregnant. However in some weird way, I still have hope. Hope that it could be possible. I know every pregnancy is different, but I have had NO symptoms at all. None, zero, zilch, nada. Except for low back pain for the last few days, which could easily be from totting around a 25 pound toddler. I went back and through my blog, and found my BFP symptoms post after my successful cycle with M, and they were all typical pregnancy symptoms, none of which I have :(
So here I will stay in my hope bubble until the morning of Thanksgiving. To which I will wake up, POAS, and then regardless of the results, come out and face the world and enjoy my day and all its blessings. Because I really do have SO much to be thankful for.
Reality is though, is that deep down I don't think I'm pregnant. However in some weird way, I still have hope. Hope that it could be possible. I know every pregnancy is different, but I have had NO symptoms at all. None, zero, zilch, nada. Except for low back pain for the last few days, which could easily be from totting around a 25 pound toddler. I went back and through my blog, and found my BFP symptoms post after my successful cycle with M, and they were all typical pregnancy symptoms, none of which I have :(
So here I will stay in my hope bubble until the morning of Thanksgiving. To which I will wake up, POAS, and then regardless of the results, come out and face the world and enjoy my day and all its blessings. Because I really do have SO much to be thankful for.
2 more sleeps!
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
2ww Turmoil
Today I am 6dpiui and doing fine, but the days leading up to this point have not been so great. And just like how everything about the beginning of this cycle has been different, so has this 2ww....
I started spotting at 2dpiui, and spotted pink, red, brown, and everything in between on and off until 4dpiui. That has NEVER happened to me. I have had 6 IUI's, 2 HSG's, 2 Saline Sono's, and never once spotted after any of those procedures. I have even joked in the past that my cervix is made of steel. So this was driving me completely batty. BUT I did have sex that day, so I chalked it up to my cervix being irritated from the IUI and my husband having moves like Jagger.
Now that that drama has finally commenced, we've moved onto happier times. Surprisingly, this 2ww is actually flying by! I started progesterone on 3dpiui, and although I haven't experienced any real symptoms yet, I *think* I had some mild cramping on and off on 4dpiui. Which is a great sign in my book. The cycle I got pregnant with M, I had mild AF type cramps from 4-7dpiui.
And just to leave you all on the edge of your seats a little longer, I've decided not to test on my usual 12dpiui this cycle, but rather wait until 14dpiui (on Thanksgiving) to test. This is the last time I will ever get to hope that I could be pregnant, so I want to hang onto that and stay in my hope bubble as long as possible.
I started spotting at 2dpiui, and spotted pink, red, brown, and everything in between on and off until 4dpiui. That has NEVER happened to me. I have had 6 IUI's, 2 HSG's, 2 Saline Sono's, and never once spotted after any of those procedures. I have even joked in the past that my cervix is made of steel. So this was driving me completely batty. BUT I did have sex that day, so I chalked it up to my cervix being irritated from the IUI and my husband having moves like Jagger.
Now that that drama has finally commenced, we've moved onto happier times. Surprisingly, this 2ww is actually flying by! I started progesterone on 3dpiui, and although I haven't experienced any real symptoms yet, I *think* I had some mild cramping on and off on 4dpiui. Which is a great sign in my book. The cycle I got pregnant with M, I had mild AF type cramps from 4-7dpiui.
And just to leave you all on the edge of your seats a little longer, I've decided not to test on my usual 12dpiui this cycle, but rather wait until 14dpiui (on Thanksgiving) to test. This is the last time I will ever get to hope that I could be pregnant, so I want to hang onto that and stay in my hope bubble as long as possible.
Breathe Lisa breathe....
Thursday, November 10, 2011
I Need A Miracle
Today was the big day. Our final attempt to have baby # 2 together. If you would have asked me how I really felt about this day a few months ago, I would have totally lost it. But today, surprisingly enough, I was calm and clear. It was almost like I was in 3rd person. Talking with the staff at my clinic, laughing, hugging and praying....All knowing that this would very well be my last visit. It was strange...
Last night I baked 2 pumpkin loaves to bring to the clinic this morning. My way of thanking them for helping me have a family. I mean, its the least I could do. I am so close with so many of the staff there and they have all been so supportive and amazing. One loaf was for the staff to share, and 1 for my RE with a little note thanking him for being my biggest cheerleader over the years.
I also brought....get ready for this...a fresh sperm sample from my husband so they could do a basic S/A. We don't plan on using any birth control and we needed to know exactly what we have going on in there. I also figured if there was anything, they could add it to our frozen sample to use today, because hey the more the merrier! Well I really didn't have to worry about either of those things, because there was none.
That's right. No sperm in his sample. Not one sperm at all. Nothing.
I have to admit, although I wasn't expecting anything much I was surprised there weren't a few. But my husband, my husband on the other hand was shocked. He thought for sure there would be some...I don't know, maybe a few hundred thousand. (For all those non IF'er a normal sperm count is 20-150 MILLION)
So that far distant dream that every infertile has of one day having that "surprise miracle BFP" will never happen to me. Ever. That is for certain.
And this even more cemented how done we really are after this. Talk about pressure. The sperm guy at the clinic was sweating bullets!
Against my RE's wishes, I walked in ready to go out with a bang. My plan was to use all of our 5 vials we had left on this last Hail Mary Cycle. My RE (and everyone else at the clinic) thought I should save 1 vial...just in case I win the lottery, but I cant. I just cant have that hanging over my head. I will always feel that tug on my heart. Because I do desperately want a second child with him.
They started the thaw, and all I could do was pray. Pray we had decent numbers. And then the sperm guy called up.
3 Million post wash. They really like it to be at least 5mil, but what can you do?
And if you would have told me THIS a few months ago, my stomach would have sank and I would have been on the verge of puking. But this time was different. I've been preparing for this. I took a deep breathe, held onto my hope and said lets do this.
It went well, they took it really really slow, and I've had hardly any cramping today (which I normally have). I took it easy today, because you know I'm trying to get pregnant here and oddly enough I feel good. Even with 3 million sperm, even though I know all odds are against us, I feel good.
Pregnancy test is on Thanksgiving. Lets hope I have even more to be thankful for this year.
Last night I baked 2 pumpkin loaves to bring to the clinic this morning. My way of thanking them for helping me have a family. I mean, its the least I could do. I am so close with so many of the staff there and they have all been so supportive and amazing. One loaf was for the staff to share, and 1 for my RE with a little note thanking him for being my biggest cheerleader over the years.
I also brought....get ready for this...a fresh sperm sample from my husband so they could do a basic S/A. We don't plan on using any birth control and we needed to know exactly what we have going on in there. I also figured if there was anything, they could add it to our frozen sample to use today, because hey the more the merrier! Well I really didn't have to worry about either of those things, because there was none.
That's right. No sperm in his sample. Not one sperm at all. Nothing.
I have to admit, although I wasn't expecting anything much I was surprised there weren't a few. But my husband, my husband on the other hand was shocked. He thought for sure there would be some...I don't know, maybe a few hundred thousand. (For all those non IF'er a normal sperm count is 20-150 MILLION)
So that far distant dream that every infertile has of one day having that "surprise miracle BFP" will never happen to me. Ever. That is for certain.
And this even more cemented how done we really are after this. Talk about pressure. The sperm guy at the clinic was sweating bullets!
Against my RE's wishes, I walked in ready to go out with a bang. My plan was to use all of our 5 vials we had left on this last Hail Mary Cycle. My RE (and everyone else at the clinic) thought I should save 1 vial...just in case I win the lottery, but I cant. I just cant have that hanging over my head. I will always feel that tug on my heart. Because I do desperately want a second child with him.
They started the thaw, and all I could do was pray. Pray we had decent numbers. And then the sperm guy called up.
3 Million post wash. They really like it to be at least 5mil, but what can you do?
And if you would have told me THIS a few months ago, my stomach would have sank and I would have been on the verge of puking. But this time was different. I've been preparing for this. I took a deep breathe, held onto my hope and said lets do this.
It went well, they took it really really slow, and I've had hardly any cramping today (which I normally have). I took it easy today, because you know I'm trying to get pregnant here and oddly enough I feel good. Even with 3 million sperm, even though I know all odds are against us, I feel good.
Pregnancy test is on Thanksgiving. Lets hope I have even more to be thankful for this year.
Monday, November 7, 2011
CD 10 {Hail Mary Cycle}
I went in for my first monitoring appointment with Mr. Wandy today and this cycle is already turning out to be different. First of all, my right ovary is dead. Once again, I didn't produce any sizable follicles on that side even though we started out with a higher dose in hopes to kick start both ovaries. My RE thinks that's just they way my body is now, and the only way to wake it up would be to give me much higher doses of stims. But with IUI's, that's not really an option with out having a VERY high risk for multiples, so high that that's out of the question. So lefty is just going to have to pull all the weight around here!
I had 3 follies on the left side, a 20mm, a 16mm, and a 15mm. My lining was better than the previous cycles at a 8.5. I cant believe I was pretty much ready to go on CD 10. This is the response that I used to get! These last 2 cycles I was using Bravelle because a dear friend gave it to me (and lets be honest, fertility drugs are MUCHO expensive) and I just wasnt getting great results. Bottom line, what I've learned is that I have a MUCH better response on follistim than I do with Bravelle!
I will do one more 75iu follisitm shot tonight, trigger shot tomorrow night at 11:30pm, and go in for my insemination on Thursday at 9:30 am! Now I just have to keep everything crossed that we have a semi decent sperm count after the thaw on Thursday.
My RE seemed VERY optimistic and thinks I responded beautifully. And for the first time in many cycles, I walked out feeling great. Great about my appointment, great about this cycle, and great about the future!
I had 3 follies on the left side, a 20mm, a 16mm, and a 15mm. My lining was better than the previous cycles at a 8.5. I cant believe I was pretty much ready to go on CD 10. This is the response that I used to get! These last 2 cycles I was using Bravelle because a dear friend gave it to me (and lets be honest, fertility drugs are MUCHO expensive) and I just wasnt getting great results. Bottom line, what I've learned is that I have a MUCH better response on follistim than I do with Bravelle!
I will do one more 75iu follisitm shot tonight, trigger shot tomorrow night at 11:30pm, and go in for my insemination on Thursday at 9:30 am! Now I just have to keep everything crossed that we have a semi decent sperm count after the thaw on Thursday.
My RE seemed VERY optimistic and thinks I responded beautifully. And for the first time in many cycles, I walked out feeling great. Great about my appointment, great about this cycle, and great about the future!
Monday, October 31, 2011
It's Go Time
Today is CD 3 and I had my baseline appointment this morning, my cyst was finally gone so that means I will start injections tonight! Here's the plan (so far) for this cycle; our last attempt to have another child together:
CD 3: 125 units of Follistim
CD 4: 100 units
CD 5: 75 units
CD 6: 75 units
CD 8: 50 units - start daily OPK's
CD 10 (next Monday): First follie scan!
We will tweak at that point if necessary. The thing is, my body responds so differently each cycle now a days, so its really a crap shoot. We want to kick my ovaries into gear initially, and then back down so I don't end up with too many follies. It's such a fine line when dealing with injectables but even though we are using crappy frozen sperm, we are not going to be reckless. I am hoping for 1-2 nice fat mature eggs on each side!
I cant wait to get this cycle going, so far I feel pretty optimistic!
CD 3: 125 units of Follistim
CD 4: 100 units
CD 5: 75 units
CD 6: 75 units
CD 8: 50 units - start daily OPK's
CD 10 (next Monday): First follie scan!
We will tweak at that point if necessary. The thing is, my body responds so differently each cycle now a days, so its really a crap shoot. We want to kick my ovaries into gear initially, and then back down so I don't end up with too many follies. It's such a fine line when dealing with injectables but even though we are using crappy frozen sperm, we are not going to be reckless. I am hoping for 1-2 nice fat mature eggs on each side!
I cant wait to get this cycle going, so far I feel pretty optimistic!
Saturday, October 29, 2011
The Red Witch
A funny thing happened this morning. I woke up, went to the bathroom, then literally was startled to the point where my ass gained some air time when I wiped and saw RED! OMG!
I mean, I knew I would eventually get my period, but since I haven't had a hormone free cycle in 8+ months, and just got off a 2 month birth control stint with a nice big fat hormone inducing cyst, I wasn't expecting her for at least another week or two.
.
So you can see why I was startled! Because this means that (if today is CD 1) I will be going in on Monday for my baseline u/s, and will start shots for our last treatment cycle. And if you've been following along you know I went from going through IUI's, to IVF, and back to IUI's again but if you haven't read the latest, read this.
I mean, I knew I would eventually get my period, but since I haven't had a hormone free cycle in 8+ months, and just got off a 2 month birth control stint with a nice big fat hormone inducing cyst, I wasn't expecting her for at least another week or two.
.
So you can see why I was startled! Because this means that (if today is CD 1) I will be going in on Monday for my baseline u/s, and will start shots for our last treatment cycle. And if you've been following along you know I went from going through IUI's, to IVF, and back to IUI's again but if you haven't read the latest, read this.
HERE WE GO!!!!!
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Realizations
A few days ago, I woke up contemplating this whole TTC baby number 3 thing. It was weird because over these last 2 cycles, knowing I was on a forced break, I haven't even thought about TTC. It would be like wasted energy right now, so I just tucked it away knowing that I would face it all again soon- just not right now. I popped my birth control pills nightly, and it hasn't crossed my mind. So waking up this particular morning with all these thoughts and feelings was just weird. I hadn't dreamed about it, or talked about it, but it was the FIRST thing that hit my mind when my eyes opened that particular morning.
I suddenly was contemplating why and if I should just stick to the original plan with this whole thing, which was to use the 2 frozen sperm samples with IUI's no matter if it were 1 attempt, or 3, and if it worked then it was meant to be and if not that was it. No more children.
But see, as I got closer and closer to the end of my rope I panicked. Pure and utter panic on the inside. Knowing that I would never be a mother again, knowing that I would never feel my baby kick inside me, knowing I would never make another bottle, or hold another baby to sleep. Knowing in fact, the option to grow my family was no longer an option.
Don't get me wrong, at the same time the other part of my brain is SO INCREDIBLY THANKFUL for allowing me to even experience this once, let alone twice, knowing how lucky I am to have TWO beautiful children and wondering if and why I cant just be happy with my family of four. So I don't want anyone to think "Oh poor you who are you to whine? You have two kids and I'm still trying to have one, you've had your turn SO GET OVER IT". Because honestly, I probably would think the same thing.
On the other hand, no one can tell you when your family is complete, and not to scare the infertiles who are still TTC and read my blog (if there are any) just because you've had a successful pregnancy and a baby doesn't make ANY of those infertile feelings go away. Especially if you do want another.
Back to the other morning....
I woke up, grabbed a cup of coffee, and grabbed my phone. Twitter has become such an amazing place for support for me. There, I have had a chance to bond with other IF woman, secondary IF woman, others moms and it really has been amazing place to have. I posted that morning:
And one of my dear twitter friends who just went through her 3rd IVF that ended up in a miscarriage replied to me and said:
All day that comment resonated with me. All day. She was right. And I m the QUEEN of what ifs when it comes to dealing with my own infertility. Her comment made me realized that I had made these decisions, but because of fear and "what ifs" I constantly changed my plan of action. And there will always be what ifs...always.
For 2 days I thought about this and the more I thought about it, the clearer it became to me. Why would I take 10k when I have a family to try and have another baby? I could put that money towards my girls college fund. Why didn't I just stick with the plan? (Although we've figured that out now) And look at what I've drug my poor husband though.
And suddenly I knew what the answer was. I need to stick with the original plan. No matter how scary, or uncertain it is. It's the best decision for my family. Maybe I needed more time to think, or maybe it took me getting to that point to realize I would be okay if this was it. Because that's also something that I've realized. I will be okay if I don't have another baby. I will find a way to move on, because I will have to. And I am finally okay with that.
I had made all this up before talking to my husband. So as we were driving in the car a few days later and I looked at him and said "Honey, I have been thinking about this whole baby thing" he nodded his head like okay here we go again and I said "And I am starting to wonder if we (or I) should have just stuck to the original plan" HIS EYE BALLS ALMOST POPPED OUT OF HIS HEAD. He was shocked that I had taken such a step back. He agreed, as he always had, that the original plan was best.
I ended the conversation with this... "Okay, we will do the final IUI, but if I end up with triplets its all your fault"! : )
I suddenly was contemplating why and if I should just stick to the original plan with this whole thing, which was to use the 2 frozen sperm samples with IUI's no matter if it were 1 attempt, or 3, and if it worked then it was meant to be and if not that was it. No more children.
But see, as I got closer and closer to the end of my rope I panicked. Pure and utter panic on the inside. Knowing that I would never be a mother again, knowing that I would never feel my baby kick inside me, knowing I would never make another bottle, or hold another baby to sleep. Knowing in fact, the option to grow my family was no longer an option.
Don't get me wrong, at the same time the other part of my brain is SO INCREDIBLY THANKFUL for allowing me to even experience this once, let alone twice, knowing how lucky I am to have TWO beautiful children and wondering if and why I cant just be happy with my family of four. So I don't want anyone to think "Oh poor you who are you to whine? You have two kids and I'm still trying to have one, you've had your turn SO GET OVER IT". Because honestly, I probably would think the same thing.
On the other hand, no one can tell you when your family is complete, and not to scare the infertiles who are still TTC and read my blog (if there are any) just because you've had a successful pregnancy and a baby doesn't make ANY of those infertile feelings go away. Especially if you do want another.
Back to the other morning....
I woke up, grabbed a cup of coffee, and grabbed my phone. Twitter has become such an amazing place for support for me. There, I have had a chance to bond with other IF woman, secondary IF woman, others moms and it really has been amazing place to have. I posted that morning:
Woke up this morning feeling very conflicted about our whole TTC #3 plan. Feeling like maybe we should have just stuck to the original plan...
Which was to use our 2 samples of frozen sperm for IUIs and if it worked, then it was meant to be. If not, then that was it...
I got so close to the end of the rope w/ our last IUI that I panicked. RE told me that w/ our sperm if we really wanted success IVF was best...
But now I'm starting to wonder if I should just stick to the original plan. We have 5 (although crappy) vials left. Enough for 1 more IUI...
I'm just so conflicted with it all...I wish someone could just tell me what the right thing to do is...
And one of my dear twitter friends who just went through her 3rd IVF that ended up in a miscarriage replied to me and said:
"There is no right- all you can do is make a decision and go with it. Once you've decided, don't go back and do the "what ifs" Good luck!"
All day that comment resonated with me. All day. She was right. And I m the QUEEN of what ifs when it comes to dealing with my own infertility. Her comment made me realized that I had made these decisions, but because of fear and "what ifs" I constantly changed my plan of action. And there will always be what ifs...always.
For 2 days I thought about this and the more I thought about it, the clearer it became to me. Why would I take 10k when I have a family to try and have another baby? I could put that money towards my girls college fund. Why didn't I just stick with the plan? (Although we've figured that out now) And look at what I've drug my poor husband though.
And suddenly I knew what the answer was. I need to stick with the original plan. No matter how scary, or uncertain it is. It's the best decision for my family. Maybe I needed more time to think, or maybe it took me getting to that point to realize I would be okay if this was it. Because that's also something that I've realized. I will be okay if I don't have another baby. I will find a way to move on, because I will have to. And I am finally okay with that.
I had made all this up before talking to my husband. So as we were driving in the car a few days later and I looked at him and said "Honey, I have been thinking about this whole baby thing" he nodded his head like okay here we go again and I said "And I am starting to wonder if we (or I) should have just stuck to the original plan" HIS EYE BALLS ALMOST POPPED OUT OF HIS HEAD. He was shocked that I had taken such a step back. He agreed, as he always had, that the original plan was best.
I ended the conversation with this... "Okay, we will do the final IUI, but if I end up with triplets its all your fault"! : )
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
My Poor Neglected Blog
I cant believe its been a month since I've updated my blog. This time of year in general is just so busy for us, and we've had a few unexpected curve balls in life which has left me little time to blog. Plus M has been VERY demanding of my time and wont let me spend any time on the computer, much less do anything else besides cater to her :). I'm lucky to check my email every few days, so yeah its been like that! Then now that K has been back in school, she's busy with homework, activities and play dates. Plus you know I am on the board of the PTO at her school. All of this = no time for blogging. I have been popping on every now and then to check on some of your blogs....Those of you who are expecting, those TTC, and those living the dream :) and although I haven't had time to comment I've been thinking of you all!
M was baptised! It was a beautiful day and she did great. I was worried because shes a busy toddler who's favorite words are NO, STOP, and MINE. To quote Teresa from The Real Housewives of New Jersey "She's sweet, but just don't cross her" ; ) Don't you love that show??! Best season yet!
K top front teeth are both LOOSE! She should be toothless in no time! Cant wait to see her like that, I'm sure its going to be weird!
M got all 4 incisors in the last 4 weeks...which is another reason why you haven't seen me. This brings her grand total to 16 teeth. How many damn teeth do you have? Momma cant handle much more! She also peed on the potty for the first time!!! Although we are far from really potty training, it was so exciting.
I developed HUGE cyst after that last round of fertility treatments (my largest ever) measuring 60x60mm and was put on the pill to shrink it. After a month of bc pills, it was still 30mm last week so I am starting another pill pack today. So I m officially on a forced break. Stupid cyst! I was actually really looking forward to have a natural cycle this month with all my body has been through these last 6 months, so hopefully next month I will be hormone FREE! But TTC is on hold for now..
Ive been working a lot more, and moved my "office" here at home to our actual office so that has limited my internet time even more. Also, I've been dealing with a lot personally with the whole TTC thing (or lack thereof) and the future of our business, and so many other things. It has caused my anxiety to increase greatly. I actually started Effex.or 2 weeks ago to help me get through these hard times, so I am hoping that will help. Anyone take it? Success? I go through phases in life where my anxiety will be worse than others, and its just one of those cycles I guess with all these stressful things going on.
And last but not least, we added a new addition to our family!! We got a new furbaby!! We adopted a 10 week old baby kitten and her name is Sweetie. K had an instant connection with her at the shelter and she has been the perfect addition to our family. She really is the perfect little cat with the best personality...not too crazy, not too shy, shes perfect! I figure if I cant have a real baby, a new furbaby is the next best thing :) We LOVE her and the girls are over the moon!
Here's a quick run down of some highlights from the last month:
M was baptised! It was a beautiful day and she did great. I was worried because shes a busy toddler who's favorite words are NO, STOP, and MINE. To quote Teresa from The Real Housewives of New Jersey "She's sweet, but just don't cross her" ; ) Don't you love that show??! Best season yet!
K top front teeth are both LOOSE! She should be toothless in no time! Cant wait to see her like that, I'm sure its going to be weird!
I developed HUGE cyst after that last round of fertility treatments (my largest ever) measuring 60x60mm and was put on the pill to shrink it. After a month of bc pills, it was still 30mm last week so I am starting another pill pack today. So I m officially on a forced break. Stupid cyst! I was actually really looking forward to have a natural cycle this month with all my body has been through these last 6 months, so hopefully next month I will be hormone FREE! But TTC is on hold for now..
Ive been working a lot more, and moved my "office" here at home to our actual office so that has limited my internet time even more. Also, I've been dealing with a lot personally with the whole TTC thing (or lack thereof) and the future of our business, and so many other things. It has caused my anxiety to increase greatly. I actually started Effex.or 2 weeks ago to help me get through these hard times, so I am hoping that will help. Anyone take it? Success? I go through phases in life where my anxiety will be worse than others, and its just one of those cycles I guess with all these stressful things going on.
And last but not least, we added a new addition to our family!! We got a new furbaby!! We adopted a 10 week old baby kitten and her name is Sweetie. K had an instant connection with her at the shelter and she has been the perfect addition to our family. She really is the perfect little cat with the best personality...not too crazy, not too shy, shes perfect! I figure if I cant have a real baby, a new furbaby is the next best thing :) We LOVE her and the girls are over the moon!
Monday, August 15, 2011
Life Lately
Man, I hate not being able to blog more than once a week, because when that happens I have like 2947629204 things to say and my posts become a jarbled mess about everything. Well this is going to be one of those posts, along with some pictures of course. I've been crazy busy with lots of things going on...so where do we start...
I continued my birthday celebration and had a fabulous girls weekend here at The W Hotel. Here we call them "staycations". Its where you check into one of the local resorts in the summer and have little getaway without leaving the city. Its very popular here in the summer, then the snow birds come in and take over. It was the most perfect weekend! I had SO much fun! Our weekend included going out for cocktail's, lounging pool side, and sushi of course! All kid and husband free...because every girl needs that once in a while.
I continued my birthday celebration and had a fabulous girls weekend here at The W Hotel. Here we call them "staycations". Its where you check into one of the local resorts in the summer and have little getaway without leaving the city. Its very popular here in the summer, then the snow birds come in and take over. It was the most perfect weekend! I had SO much fun! Our weekend included going out for cocktail's, lounging pool side, and sushi of course! All kid and husband free...because every girl needs that once in a while.
K started back at school last Thursday. 2nd grade people! Boy this summer went by SO quick!
I cant believe it. I am going to miss the little booger with me all the time. It was a lot less stressful starting school this year because her first grade teacher looped up to 2nd grade and took her whole class with her. So K has the same teacher and classmates as last year! Easy peasy. She also started dance again, so we are at the dance studio 2 afternoon's a week.
Little M is fabulous these days, we are loving this age. She is 19 months, can you believe that?!
(blurry but so cute!)
She is slowly starting to talk more, she tries she really does. She says: Dada, mama, kay kay, cat, meow, quack quack, die die (bye bye, lol.), cup, hi, hug, eyes, nose, and a few more. She LOVES to give kisses and loves to draw. Circles are her favorite...
She's learning her shapes and colors, loves playing with her little people, baby doll, and books. We are already thinking about putting her in school part time once she turns 2 after the new year.
She is also a teething mess right now, cutting all 4 incisors at once. These and the molars have been the worst. But she's still a little angel!
Work has been stressful, business has been SO bad the last couple months, which is kinda scary. However I am hopeful that things will turn around soon. We've had bad times before and bounced back, but this has been pretty bad. It's been a stresser that's for sure!
And on the TTC front, I am 16 or 17 dpo and still waiting on my period to show up! ARG! That's the one thing I hate about not taking progesterone in the 2ww....being out of control. I took a trigger shot, so surely I O'ed, but I do think I have a cyst. Ever since my trigger, my left ovary has been really bothering me so maybe that's why I haven't gotten AF yet? Who knows, hopefully that b!tch shows up soon because the plan is to stat bcp once she arrives to prep for IVF. We are still trying to work out the finances, but I am hoping and praying it works out. In any case, I am preparing and going on bcp's is the first step!
So as you can see we've been really busy, and we have family in town this week but hopefully I can get back to blogging regularly again soon! Miss you guys!
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
My Birthday & A Surprising Update
Sorry I haven't been updating the blog, I've had a crazy week! Monday was my birthday...you know...the big 29 I mean 26! On Friday my BFF who lives in LA decided since she had 3 days off that she would drive over and surprise me! That was the best gift ever...to be able to spend 3 days with her and her little one (who is 4 months younger than M!). I was lucky enough to spend my birthday with all the people that mean the most to me, and that's all I really wanted. The new pink Coach bag they got me wasn't too bad either ; ) We went to Benihana's to kick off my last year in my 20's.
Now onto the surprising update...
Monday I had an IVF consult at my clinic and tomorrow I have another one at another clinic who is offering a more competitive price for IVF right now as part of s summer special. You read that right, we *MIGHT* be doing IVF! Betcha thought I'd never say that again! I never thought I'd say that again! Nothing is set in stone, and no final decision has been made, but I am really working on getting my DH on board. He agreed to me going for the consults, and obviously is considering it.
Now it all comes down to the numbers. It costs SO much money and we are all OOP, which is why I am even consulting at another clinic- cost! Meds alone would run me 2,500-3,500!! I just don't know if in the end I can get him to agree to spending that much money, so I am trying my best to get this as cheap as possible. I have contacted a group who helps donate unopened/unexpired fertility meds to those who need it to see if anyone has anything to donate, so I have been added to the "want list". My current RE would put me on the antagonist protocal, so I need follistim or other similar stim, low dose hcg, ganirelix, and estrace. If any of you have anything left over, I can take that off your hands ; ) ANYTHING would help!
We'll see how it goes tomorrow with the other RE and then we'll go from there! If we do this, I would start birth control (21 days as part of the antagonist protocol) when I get my next period, which would be in another week or two! I just PRAY and PRAY that this works out.
We took a trip to the splash pad...
and then us momma's had some 'big girl time' and went out for sushi and dessert!
Monday I had an IVF consult at my clinic and tomorrow I have another one at another clinic who is offering a more competitive price for IVF right now as part of s summer special. You read that right, we *MIGHT* be doing IVF! Betcha thought I'd never say that again! I never thought I'd say that again! Nothing is set in stone, and no final decision has been made, but I am really working on getting my DH on board. He agreed to me going for the consults, and obviously is considering it.
Now it all comes down to the numbers. It costs SO much money and we are all OOP, which is why I am even consulting at another clinic- cost! Meds alone would run me 2,500-3,500!! I just don't know if in the end I can get him to agree to spending that much money, so I am trying my best to get this as cheap as possible. I have contacted a group who helps donate unopened/unexpired fertility meds to those who need it to see if anyone has anything to donate, so I have been added to the "want list". My current RE would put me on the antagonist protocal, so I need follistim or other similar stim, low dose hcg, ganirelix, and estrace. If any of you have anything left over, I can take that off your hands ; ) ANYTHING would help!
We'll see how it goes tomorrow with the other RE and then we'll go from there! If we do this, I would start birth control (21 days as part of the antagonist protocol) when I get my next period, which would be in another week or two! I just PRAY and PRAY that this works out.
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
CD 9- Am I Crazy?
It's official. I'm a nutcase and a glutton for punishment. Why? Because today I cancelled my own cycle. Why? Because I didn't feel like it was perfect and there was NO WAY I was going to use up my precious sperm on a less than ideal cycle.
Today, I had 3 follies on the left side (1) 13 and (2) 15's. Nothing on the right. Lining was a little thin (didn't get the exact measurement, but its still early). Yes, technically that's a good response to have 3 eggs, but I want targets on BOTH sides. I don't want all my eggs in one basket. I want to go out feeling like I had a perfect cycle with a perfect opportunity to become pregnant. And then if it didn't work- I know I gave it my best shot. So I cancelled.
My RE agreed, even though he did say I responded well. He understands whats a stake here and wants
me to feel 100% comfortable moving forward. He did mention that really if I really wanted to achieve a pregnancy, that I should do IVF given our circumstances. I agree, but getting my husband to agree to spend 12k to have another baby when we already have 2 precious children is a whole other story. But that really is our best shot and I know that.
Now I am seconding guessing my decision. Maybe I am trying to reach something that is unattainable? Maybe I am asking too much of my body? Was it absolutely crazy to cancel this cycle? I did have 3 eggs! What if it would have worked? What if next cycle doesn't work, and then I think I should gone forward this time? It's a whirlwind of questions flooding my mind right now.
I am full of shoulda, coulda, woulda's and what if's. I just don't know anymore. I feel like no matter what decision I make regarding these last few cycles, I am always going to question if it was the right choice. All I want is another child. So I feel like I need to give myself the best opportunity to do so given what we have to work with and I just don't feel like this was it. Was it good? Yes. Was is good enough to make me feel 100% content moving forward and using the rest of our sperm? No. It wasn't. But will I ever feel 100% happy? That is the million dollar question.
We are not completely scrapping this cycle. I am still going to trigger on Thursday and do timed intercourse on Thursday and Saturday, even though we all know that is a LONG shot. Very long. So long that my Dr. said to not even bother taking the progesterone, to take a break from that. But you never know, miracles can happen!
Next cycle should start in 2 weeks and we will change up the protocol a bit to try and stimulate both ovaries. Start with a higher dose, and tapper down. At least this way, if only 1 ovary responds again we will know that that's just how my body works and I can get the idea of having eggs on both sides out of my brain.
In the mean time, I am going to plant the IVF seed in my husbands brain again and see if I can get him on board. How many BJ's do you think it will take to get him to agree?
Today, I had 3 follies on the left side (1) 13 and (2) 15's. Nothing on the right. Lining was a little thin (didn't get the exact measurement, but its still early). Yes, technically that's a good response to have 3 eggs, but I want targets on BOTH sides. I don't want all my eggs in one basket. I want to go out feeling like I had a perfect cycle with a perfect opportunity to become pregnant. And then if it didn't work- I know I gave it my best shot. So I cancelled.
My RE agreed, even though he did say I responded well. He understands whats a stake here and wants
me to feel 100% comfortable moving forward. He did mention that really if I really wanted to achieve a pregnancy, that I should do IVF given our circumstances. I agree, but getting my husband to agree to spend 12k to have another baby when we already have 2 precious children is a whole other story. But that really is our best shot and I know that.
Now I am seconding guessing my decision. Maybe I am trying to reach something that is unattainable? Maybe I am asking too much of my body? Was it absolutely crazy to cancel this cycle? I did have 3 eggs! What if it would have worked? What if next cycle doesn't work, and then I think I should gone forward this time? It's a whirlwind of questions flooding my mind right now.
I am full of shoulda, coulda, woulda's and what if's. I just don't know anymore. I feel like no matter what decision I make regarding these last few cycles, I am always going to question if it was the right choice. All I want is another child. So I feel like I need to give myself the best opportunity to do so given what we have to work with and I just don't feel like this was it. Was it good? Yes. Was is good enough to make me feel 100% content moving forward and using the rest of our sperm? No. It wasn't. But will I ever feel 100% happy? That is the million dollar question.
We are not completely scrapping this cycle. I am still going to trigger on Thursday and do timed intercourse on Thursday and Saturday, even though we all know that is a LONG shot. Very long. So long that my Dr. said to not even bother taking the progesterone, to take a break from that. But you never know, miracles can happen!
Next cycle should start in 2 weeks and we will change up the protocol a bit to try and stimulate both ovaries. Start with a higher dose, and tapper down. At least this way, if only 1 ovary responds again we will know that that's just how my body works and I can get the idea of having eggs on both sides out of my brain.
In the mean time, I am going to plant the IVF seed in my husbands brain again and see if I can get him on board. How many BJ's do you think it will take to get him to agree?
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Our Hail Mary Cycle
It's official. We are starting our final treatment cycle. This is it folks! It's our hail mary-please-god-let-it-work-or-we-will-never-have-another-baby cycle. I called into my clinic on Monday (CD 1) only to find out that my RE was on vacation. My plan was to have my CD 3 scan scheduled with my RE so we could also discuss protocol changes. Sort of a two for the price of appointment. Well once I found out he wasn't there, I told the nurse what I had in mind for this next cycle. All injects and NO clomid because of the headaches. It was so bad last cycle that I swore I would NEVER TAKE THAT DRUG AGAIN. I would rather take the shots every single day than deal with those headaches.
She said she would talk to the other RE and see if he was willing to go along with it. I wasn't so sure he'd be okay with it based off looking at my chart...I mean they are pretty conservative and given my age (28/29 next month) and the fact that I have had 2 successful pregnancies, and at my RE himself has twins, they are VERY CAREFUL with me. I get it. I don't want HOM, or even twins either, but lets loosen up the reins here a bit. The last 2 haven't worked and this is my last shot. We are using frozen sperm, so LETS DO IT! I wanna go out with a bang!
After waiting patiently for the call to get the go ahead or not, I was very surprised when they called me back and told me that they called MY RE on vacation to go over my med protocol. See? This is why I love them! They all know SO much is riding on this. They are all really rooting for me, and I just love them.
Well he went along with it! A very conservative injectable dose, but he went along with it! I start the shots today! My protocol is as follows (I will be using Bravelle again):
CD 3 : 100 units
CD 4, 6, & 8, : 75 units
Start OPK's on CD 8 (man those are the devil) and come in for monitoring on CD 11.
I started doing some reading and it seems like when people are on only injects, they start monitoring much sooner than CD 11. For those of you who have done inject IUI's- should I be worried? Do you think they should bring me in sooner? As you can see it is a very conservative dose, but I know the injects really speed things along and you can go a lot sooner.
I have never done all injects before so I am VERY interested to see how things go this time! Hoping for 3-4 nice mature follies. Follie dust please :) Lets get these eggies growing!
She said she would talk to the other RE and see if he was willing to go along with it. I wasn't so sure he'd be okay with it based off looking at my chart...I mean they are pretty conservative and given my age (28/29 next month) and the fact that I have had 2 successful pregnancies, and at my RE himself has twins, they are VERY CAREFUL with me. I get it. I don't want HOM, or even twins either, but lets loosen up the reins here a bit. The last 2 haven't worked and this is my last shot. We are using frozen sperm, so LETS DO IT! I wanna go out with a bang!
After waiting patiently for the call to get the go ahead or not, I was very surprised when they called me back and told me that they called MY RE on vacation to go over my med protocol. See? This is why I love them! They all know SO much is riding on this. They are all really rooting for me, and I just love them.
Well he went along with it! A very conservative injectable dose, but he went along with it! I start the shots today! My protocol is as follows (I will be using Bravelle again):
CD 3 : 100 units
CD 4, 6, & 8, : 75 units
Start OPK's on CD 8 (man those are the devil) and come in for monitoring on CD 11.
I started doing some reading and it seems like when people are on only injects, they start monitoring much sooner than CD 11. For those of you who have done inject IUI's- should I be worried? Do you think they should bring me in sooner? As you can see it is a very conservative dose, but I know the injects really speed things along and you can go a lot sooner.
I have never done all injects before so I am VERY interested to see how things go this time! Hoping for 3-4 nice mature follies. Follie dust please :) Lets get these eggies growing!
Saturday, July 16, 2011
The Results
This mornings test was Negative.
I am Not Pregnant.
At least I can still keep my Monday morning Botox appointment (trying really hard to find a positive). Sigh.
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
8 Days In
And man this 2ww is driving me CRAZY! I feel like I am over analyzing everything. Every twinge, every cramp, every single sign that could possibly mean that I am pregnant. Truth is, I dont know. At least last cycle with our extremely low counts I knew our chances were slim. I knew it didn't work, I just knew it. So I spent my whole 2ww telling myself that and not worrying about it, while secretly praying for a miracle. This time I am much more hopeful!!
Because we had much more sperm this time around, in my mind we had a decent shot! And it could have really worked! So enter the 2ww hell of mind games and torture. Combine that with the nagging voice in the back of my mind reminding me that none of these attempts may work. That I need to be prepared to never experience pregnancy and child birth again. Never knowing what M's little sister (putting it out there already) may have looked like. And closing that whole chapter of my life. I know I have 2 beautiful girls, and believe me I know how extremely lucky I am to have them! Every night I hold each of them tightly thanking god for giving me such amazing gifts. But am I ready to say at 28 years old that I will never mother another? That is always at the back of my mind. Always. and I hate that the choice has been taken away from me. DAMN YOU INFERTILITY!!
For now my focus is making it through this week and hopefully seeing TWO glorious lines on Saturday morning!! In the mean time, I am pumping myself full of progesterone, taking a baby aspirin, drinking a big glass of POM juice every morning (something new I am trying this cycle to increase blood flow to the ute), and PRAYING!
Because we had much more sperm this time around, in my mind we had a decent shot! And it could have really worked! So enter the 2ww hell of mind games and torture. Combine that with the nagging voice in the back of my mind reminding me that none of these attempts may work. That I need to be prepared to never experience pregnancy and child birth again. Never knowing what M's little sister (putting it out there already) may have looked like. And closing that whole chapter of my life. I know I have 2 beautiful girls, and believe me I know how extremely lucky I am to have them! Every night I hold each of them tightly thanking god for giving me such amazing gifts. But am I ready to say at 28 years old that I will never mother another? That is always at the back of my mind. Always. and I hate that the choice has been taken away from me. DAMN YOU INFERTILITY!!
For now my focus is making it through this week and hopefully seeing TWO glorious lines on Saturday morning!! In the mean time, I am pumping myself full of progesterone, taking a baby aspirin, drinking a big glass of POM juice every morning (something new I am trying this cycle to increase blood flow to the ute), and PRAYING!
Monday, July 4, 2011
4th of July IUI
What were my 4th of July plans? To get inseminated that's what! The clinic was bustling this morning, full of patients causing them to be behind by an hour. The wait was worth it because when I walked into the exam room and saw the sticky note that said that my 4 defrosted vials yielded 9.6 mil total motitle count with zero round cells I was ECSTATIC!!! I mean, that is way beyond what I was hoping for. I was shooting for 5 mil, so I am so over the moon happy!! I finally feel like I got some really great news and that we actually have a shot at this! That's a far cry for the 2.4 mil last time, but the nurse did say that some of the vials will have more than others, so we hit the jackpot with one of those 4 vials.
Test date is July 16th!!
Happy 4th Everyone!!
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Back on The Wagon
The fertility treatment wagon that is! Today is CD 2 and I will start meds tomorrow for our very last cycle. My RE changed my protocol a little this cycle as as result of what happened last cycle.
CD 3-7 100 mg Clomid
CD 5 & 8 a 75 unit shot of Bravelle
Start OPK's on CD 8
First monitoring appointment on CD 11- which is Saturday July 2 and we'll go from there.
If you remember last cycle I started out great, but then things started getting weird and I stalled out mid cycle, Because of this my RE said that he decided to up my clomid. He said it can help the follicles mature later in the cycle, and that's when I started having problems last cycle. He also switched my injection days, to only 5 & 8, not sure why but my RE is very conservative and I think he is scared that I will over produce.
Here's another thing, my actual RE will be out of town while I am cycling this time. I am very nervous about this. He knows my situation and we have very open communication with one another, so if things go array again we will be consulting with another Dr. in the practice. I mean, that's fine but this cycle is critical. It is our LAST SHOT and I just really wish my Dr was there. The nurse said she was going to ask if he will be available by phone in case we need him, and hopefully he will be. It makes me a little nervous, but I know I am still in good hands with the other RE's. One of them I've seen a couple times, he actually did both my HSG's.
You may also notice that I switched from follistim to bravelle. Well that's because the follistim I was using was left over from when I was cycling with M. I've used that up, and because I am all OOP and these meds are very expensive a sweet sweet IF friend of mine donated her left over boxes of bravelle! So a huge THANK YOU to her!! At least I don't have to worry about that expense.
Picking up my meds today and will start popping pills tomorrow night! Bring it on!
CD 3-7 100 mg Clomid
CD 5 & 8 a 75 unit shot of Bravelle
Start OPK's on CD 8
First monitoring appointment on CD 11- which is Saturday July 2 and we'll go from there.
If you remember last cycle I started out great, but then things started getting weird and I stalled out mid cycle, Because of this my RE said that he decided to up my clomid. He said it can help the follicles mature later in the cycle, and that's when I started having problems last cycle. He also switched my injection days, to only 5 & 8, not sure why but my RE is very conservative and I think he is scared that I will over produce.
Here's another thing, my actual RE will be out of town while I am cycling this time. I am very nervous about this. He knows my situation and we have very open communication with one another, so if things go array again we will be consulting with another Dr. in the practice. I mean, that's fine but this cycle is critical. It is our LAST SHOT and I just really wish my Dr was there. The nurse said she was going to ask if he will be available by phone in case we need him, and hopefully he will be. It makes me a little nervous, but I know I am still in good hands with the other RE's. One of them I've seen a couple times, he actually did both my HSG's.
You may also notice that I switched from follistim to bravelle. Well that's because the follistim I was using was left over from when I was cycling with M. I've used that up, and because I am all OOP and these meds are very expensive a sweet sweet IF friend of mine donated her left over boxes of bravelle! So a huge THANK YOU to her!! At least I don't have to worry about that expense.
Picking up my meds today and will start popping pills tomorrow night! Bring it on!
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Negative.
Just as I suspected, I am not pregnant. As much as I was prepared to only see one line, there still was that little part of me that was hoping and PRAYING I would get a miracle. That I would be the lucky one that had a successful IUI with only 2.4mil sperm. That I would see 2 glorious pink lines this morning.
But I didn't.
Instead it was 1 lonely line. I am surprised how much it still hurts, even after ALL day yesterday I prepped myself for this moment, trying to ignore that little glimmer of hope. Because this is what I in fact knew was going to happen, I was just hoping I was wrong, that I am just jaded by infertility, and that it would work somehow. That I would get my miracle.
I couldn't sleep last night because I was so nervous to test this morning. I kept telling myself 'Why are you worried, you know what your going to see. Don't set yourself up'. And at 5:30 this morning when I first stared at that negative test, I didn't cry. I told myself 'ofcourse'. I didn't think I was going to cry, and I was slighlgy relieved that the torture of the 2ww was over.
But as I sat down with a cup of coffee, the thoughts of what could have been creeped into my mind and a few little tears went down my face. I guess that glimmer of hope was louder than I thought. It hurts. It hurts not to be able to have sex with my husband to create a baby. It hurts to give myself shots. It hurts to drain my bank account to just try and have a family, and it hurts when all that is for nothing.
We are going on a family cruise to the eastern Caribbean for 9 days at the beginning of June, so we will be taking June off. I hate that I have to do that, but at least I will get to enjoy my vacation and hopefully that will take my mind off of things. Except for the fact that the last time we went on a cruise, I had just found out I was pregnant with M. Stupid me for thinking that would happen again.
At least I can enjoy a few cocktails though right?!
But I didn't.
Instead it was 1 lonely line. I am surprised how much it still hurts, even after ALL day yesterday I prepped myself for this moment, trying to ignore that little glimmer of hope. Because this is what I in fact knew was going to happen, I was just hoping I was wrong, that I am just jaded by infertility, and that it would work somehow. That I would get my miracle.
I couldn't sleep last night because I was so nervous to test this morning. I kept telling myself 'Why are you worried, you know what your going to see. Don't set yourself up'. And at 5:30 this morning when I first stared at that negative test, I didn't cry. I told myself 'ofcourse'. I didn't think I was going to cry, and I was slighlgy relieved that the torture of the 2ww was over.
But as I sat down with a cup of coffee, the thoughts of what could have been creeped into my mind and a few little tears went down my face. I guess that glimmer of hope was louder than I thought. It hurts. It hurts not to be able to have sex with my husband to create a baby. It hurts to give myself shots. It hurts to drain my bank account to just try and have a family, and it hurts when all that is for nothing.
We are going on a family cruise to the eastern Caribbean for 9 days at the beginning of June, so we will be taking June off. I hate that I have to do that, but at least I will get to enjoy my vacation and hopefully that will take my mind off of things. Except for the fact that the last time we went on a cruise, I had just found out I was pregnant with M. Stupid me for thinking that would happen again.
At least I can enjoy a few cocktails though right?!
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
10dpiui
And no symptoms at all. Not one. No sore boobs, not a twinge of a cramp, nothing. I know in my heart that I'm not pregnant. I told my DH yesterday that there was no way I was pregnant. His response was 'well things can happen at different times and you may not have the same symptoms as before'. I know, I know but I feel like especially because I have been pregnant twice before I would know if something was going on. Maybe not, but that's where I'm at.
And I know EXACTLY how I gained so much weight while trying to have baby M. Progesterone is the devil. I CAN NOT get full. Seriously, I will eat a meal and then 30 min. could eat another meal. Its bad. When I did get pg with M and had to stay on it for 12 weeks, I gained 12 pounds! IN THE FIRST TRI! Hello your baby is the size of a pea there is no reason to gain that kind of weight! Once I stopped it, the weight gained stopped too. It's amazing! I'm still fighting the battle though and going to the gym everyday even though my diet has been in the shitter.
2 more days until testing!!
And I know EXACTLY how I gained so much weight while trying to have baby M. Progesterone is the devil. I CAN NOT get full. Seriously, I will eat a meal and then 30 min. could eat another meal. Its bad. When I did get pg with M and had to stay on it for 12 weeks, I gained 12 pounds! IN THE FIRST TRI! Hello your baby is the size of a pea there is no reason to gain that kind of weight! Once I stopped it, the weight gained stopped too. It's amazing! I'm still fighting the battle though and going to the gym everyday even though my diet has been in the shitter.
2 more days until testing!!
Friday, May 20, 2011
6dpiui
Good lord could this 2ww go by ANY slower? I have to admit though as much as I WANT this to work, I really don't think this is it. I would love nothing more than to wake up next Thursday to 2 nice big fat pink lines, but lets face it chances are I will be seeing a lonely single line. I keep telling myself every time I muster up a little hope and think "maybe I'll be one of the lucky ones" I stop myself and say "c'mon Lisa, do you really think your gonna pee on a stick in a week and see 'Pregnant'? Get real!" Its sort of abusive really, but its the only way I can try to brace myself for a BFN. Not get my hopes up. Its an evil vicious cycle.
It's safe to say that the side effects from the progesterone are kicking in. The last 2 days I have been so drained and exhausted!
Symptom check: None yet. But it's still early, so if a did get blessed with a miracle little baby P would just now be implanting so I don't expect much yet.
This is going to be the longest 2ww EVER!
It's safe to say that the side effects from the progesterone are kicking in. The last 2 days I have been so drained and exhausted!
Symptom check: None yet. But it's still early, so if a did get blessed with a miracle little baby P would just now be implanting so I don't expect much yet.
This is going to be the longest 2ww EVER!
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