Finding balance is something we all strive for. We as people, not just women or mothers, have struggled with finding balance in our lives from time to time. I think it becomes a little harder once you become a mom because of two little words...Mommy Guilt. That kicks "finding balance" right in the ass sometimes! However, I think it's very important for moms to maintain who they are after they have a baby. Yes, I am a mother and that is by far my most important role in life right now, but I am still a wife, daughter, friend, and me, Lisa! I think it is important to maintain those other avenues of your life after becoming a mother. I hear so many moms say "My life is on hold right now because I am a mother", or "My life is dedicated to my children, so I cant do things like that" or moms that cant leave their child's side, or something of that nature and I am just completely in awe of how that can be. Yes, my life if dedicated to my children too, but does that me I can maintain me?
Yes, you can still be a you, have a life, and be a good mother. It's called finding balance.
It's not easy, but not entirely impossible! And as long as you have your priorities right (obviously my kids and marriage come first) it can be done. To me, making time for date nights away from the kids and to making sometime for your self away from the kids is a must. I go to the gym everyday, and my kids go to the child care at the gym. That's my time everyday. Should I feel bad for taking that hour that I could be spending with them, and spending it on me? Should I feel bad about leaving my kids in the germ infested child care? Is that selfish of me? I don't think so. They certainly aren't going to die, and I am showing them that independence and health and fitness is important to me and that with kids or not, you shouldn't neglect yourself. We get a baby sitter (my mom) and go on date nights about once per month, that's our time to maintain our marriage. And sometimes I have lunch with my girl friends, or get a pedicure, or simply run errands by myself. What ever it may be, I think moms need "Me" time. If not, you will eventually go crazy...trust me, I have a 6 year old!
I struggle with this whole finding balance thing too sometimes, but I try to look at it another way. Yes, its my job to be a mother right now, but it is also my job to teach my children independence, that I still value other relationships in my life, that taking care of yourself is important, that mommy needs time too, and that my marriage and making time for my husband is still a priority for me because those things are still important to me too. And ironically I am also teaching them that finding balance is important!
I am a mother, but I am still me. My children have made me better. Made my life fuller, and are single handed the most important thing in my life. But momma can still get a mani/pedi once in a while : )
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